Exercise: Self-Care or Self-Punishment?

There are a lot of things in the world that make me sad— especially right now. But one thing that makes me sad and angry is how diet-culture has co-opted exercise/movement and distorted the bejeesus out of it. Here’s the truth: so much about American exercise and fitness culture is really disordered.

Using exercise to “burn” or “earn” food isn’t healthy. Exercising when you’re not adequately nourishing your body is unhealthy, nor is feeling guilty for missing a workout. Pushing through pain or an injury and risking further injury isn’t healthy. It actually just puts more stress on the body which- newsflash- doesn’t exactly improve health outcomes.

But Rachel, exercise is supposed to be used to maintain a certain weight or physical aesthetic. Can I let you in on a secret? There is so much research that supports that exercise actually has a negligible impact on long-term weight loss/maintenance. Fitness companies don’t actually want you to know this though because that would mean they would make less money. And, also newsflash— diet and fitness companies don’t actually care about your health. They want your money.

I could do a deep dive into the research on the exercise and weight management relationship but I’m actually not going to. If you want to learn more about that, I highly recommend you read this book. What I want to draw attention to is the fact that our culture has made exercise/movement about appearances and beauty ideals, which I’d argue has made us sicker, not healthier. It is so frustrating to me that it’s almost impossible to attend a class at the gym without an instructor making a comment about body size or weight. Why? Because the assumption is that all people are attending that class to get thinner (which— let’s just be real— is really just about being more socially acceptable). And honestly, this is so harmful. And has contributed to increased rates of disordered eating/eating disorders/compulsive exercise. Ask any eating disorder therapist you know right now. We all have waitlists.

But this doesn’t mean we should just boycott gyms and never move our bodies again. See, we were made to move. I’m very pro-movement. Movement is how our bodies discharge stress, anxiety, and even trauma. Movement has so many benefits that have nothing to do with slimming down or buffing up or toning your arms. The #fitspo hashtag on Instagram is seriously so annoying, parading images of mostly white, thin women, promoting the idea that there is only one healthy or acceptable body size. Which is total BS.

Here are a few benefits of movement that have nothing to do with physical appearance:

  • Releases endorphins to boost your mood

  • Helps decrease symptoms of anxiety and depression (*unless you’re exercising for self-punishment/from a place of self-hatred. Then you’re going to be left with MORE anxiety…)

  • Boosts feelings of self-esteem / self-competency

  • Improves sleep

  • Increases creativity (*seriously, some of my best ideas come to me when I’m walking!)

  • Reduces the risk of injury

  • Increases longevity

  • Increases productivity

Here’s the good news— it’s possible to change your relationship with exercise. It’s possible to use movement as a form of self-care and self-respect instead of self-punishment.

Over the past year, an amazing colleague and friend of mine (Mimi Cole) have been writing and designing a body image workbook (fingers are crossed it gets published before the end of this year). In our workbook, we talk about how to improve your relationship with exercise. The first step in doing this is being honest with yourself about whether you have a healthy relationship with movement in the first place. Below is a graphic from our book! Take some time to reflect. Where do you find yourself?

Image taken from “A Body Image Workbook For Every Body: A guide for deconstructing diet culture, and learning how to respect, nourish, and care for your whole self” by Rachel Sellers and Mimi Cole

Image taken from “A Body Image Workbook For Every Body: A guide for deconstructing diet culture, and learning how to respect, nourish, and care for your whole self” by Rachel Sellers and Mimi Cole

If you resonate most with the words on the right side of this chart, I want you to hear that you’re not alone. Culture promotes these ideas and calls them “healthy”. These habits are encouraged and incredibly normalized. But just because something is normalized doesn’t make it beneficial for your mental or physical wellbeing. It is possible to cultivate a more balanced, intuitive approach to exercise and movement. Need some practical tips? I’ve got you covered!

Practical tools for improving your relationship with exercise:

  • Time some time off. Days, weeks, even months— especially if you’re in recovery from an eating disorder. If your reason for exercising is unhealthy and causing you stress, you might need a break to reevaluate

  • Switch it up! There are so many ways you can move your body. Find something you actually like (walking your dog, team sports, gardening, biking, bowling, etc)

  • Get intentional about the gyms/spaces/classes you go to. Does the instructor use a lot of “earn” or “burn” language? Does the company or brand promote weight loss/weight loss challenges? If they do, find a new gym!

  • Speak-up. If your instructor is promoting diet culture, you have permission to use your voice! You can say something like, “I really love your class but it’s unhelpful when you make comments about earning a dessert or burning calories.”

  • Learn. Learn about diet culture (I have several posts about it) and take time to consider the variables that have led you to have a disordered relationship with movement. What messages influence you? Are the messages you’re hearing/absorbing in line with your values? Do they make you feel good about your body?

  • Seek support. I can almost guarantee you that there is someone in your life who also wants to have a healthier relationship with exercise. Lean on each other. Go on walks together. Talk with each other about the messages you want to unlearn.

  • If you notice feelings of guilt or shame coming up for you when you think about skipping a workout, if the words “should” or “must” start swirling around your brain, resist the urge to do it. Practice noticing those emotions and get curious about their message. Ride out the urge. Remind yourself that you are no longer using exercise for self-punishment but for self-care.

  • Get rid of your fitness trackers and food logs. Seriously. Having a compensatory relationship with exercise and eating is NOT healthy and is a massive risk factor for developing an eating disorder. You don’t need to track your calories burned. You don’t need to go on a run just because you ate a brownie. Again— this is so normalized but it doesn’t change the fact that it isn’t healthy / is disordered.

Movement/exercise shouldn’t be riddled with guilt and shame and self-punishment. That’s no way to live, people.

xoxo,

Rachel

Rachel Sellers